Munna: Teray ko maaloom hai k cigarette aik tarah say slow poison ka kaam karta hai.
Patient: To mujhay konsa marnay ki jaldi hai
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Friday, March 7, 2008
Munna: Apna munn kholo.....
Patient opens his mouth: Aaaaaaaaaaaaa..........
Munna throughs his torch light in his mouth: Hmmmmmmm..... Torch sahi hai.
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Chinkie: Tum hamaisha clinic mien apnay saath meri photo bhi kyun le jaatay ho.
Munna: Apun ko jab bhi koi mushkil aati hai, apun tumhari pic dekh leta hoon aur woh prob. solve ho jaati hai.
Chinkie: Dekha! Mien tumharay liye kitni achi aur powerful hoon.
Munna: Haan! Apun teri pic dekhta hai aur apnay aap say bolta hai Is say bari bhi koi problem ho sakti hai bhala.
Patient opens his mouth: Aaaaaaaaaaaaa..........
Munna throughs his torch light in his mouth: Hmmmmmmm..... Torch sahi hai.
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Chinkie: Tum hamaisha clinic mien apnay saath meri photo bhi kyun le jaatay ho.
Munna: Apun ko jab bhi koi mushkil aati hai, apun tumhari pic dekh leta hoon aur woh prob. solve ho jaati hai.
Chinkie: Dekha! Mien tumharay liye kitni achi aur powerful hoon.
Munna: Haan! Apun teri pic dekhta hai aur apnay aap say bolta hai Is say bari bhi koi problem ho sakti hai bhala.
Raat ka time jab Munna aur chinkie apnay bed room mien so rahay thay to phone ki ghanti baji.
Voice: Aray Doctor sahab jaldi aayeay! Meray betay nay blade kha liya hai
Munna abhi jaanay k liye tayyar hi hota k dobara phone aata hai.
Voice: Doctor Sahab! Ab aanay ki koi zaroorat nahi, meray husband ko shave k liye doosra blade mil gaya hai.
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Aanand jab end mien bachon ko story sunata hai to bolta hai;
Aanand: Munna nay kaha tha k woh mujhay aik month mien meray feet pay khara kar de ga
Bachay: Phir?
Aanand: Phir kya, mujhay us ka bill pay karnay k liye apni car bechna pari.
Voice: Aray Doctor sahab jaldi aayeay! Meray betay nay blade kha liya hai
Munna abhi jaanay k liye tayyar hi hota k dobara phone aata hai.
Voice: Doctor Sahab! Ab aanay ki koi zaroorat nahi, meray husband ko shave k liye doosra blade mil gaya hai.
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Aanand jab end mien bachon ko story sunata hai to bolta hai;
Aanand: Munna nay kaha tha k woh mujhay aik month mien meray feet pay khara kar de ga
Bachay: Phir?
Aanand: Phir kya, mujhay us ka bill pay karnay k liye apni car bechna pari.
Patient: Doctor aap ko yakeen hai k mujhay Namoonia (pneumonia) hai, kyun k pichlay dino aik doctor meri friend ka Namoonia ka ilaaj karta raha aur woh Typhoid say mar gayi.
Munna: Haan ray meray ko akha yaqeen hai, tu namoonia say hi maray ga.
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Aik patient Munnabhai k paas aaya, Munna nay us ka chekup kiya aur bola
Munna: Tumharay pass ziyada waqt nahi hai
Patient: Meray pass kitna time hai.
Munna: Dus (10)
Patient: Kya Dus.... Minute..... Ghantay.......... Din......?
Munna: No (9), Aath (, Saat (7),.......
Munna: Haan ray meray ko akha yaqeen hai, tu namoonia say hi maray ga.
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Aik patient Munnabhai k paas aaya, Munna nay us ka chekup kiya aur bola
Munna: Tumharay pass ziyada waqt nahi hai
Patient: Meray pass kitna time hai.
Munna: Dus (10)
Patient: Kya Dus.... Minute..... Ghantay.......... Din......?
Munna: No (9), Aath (, Saat (7),.......
Munna: Bolay to Apun ko tera operation dobara karna paray ga.
Kyun k apun kay rubber k gloves teray andar hi reh gaye hain.
Patient: Agar yeh baat hai to mujhay jaanay do.
Mien tumharay gloves ki payment kar doon ga.
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Munna: Bolay to darad kahan hai aapko.
Patient (F): Pooray badan mien hai
Munna: Yeh kaisay ho sakta hai ray, kuch detail batao.
Patient: Tocuhes her right knee and says here, then touches her earlobe and says here, then touches her left cheek and says here, etc.
Munna: Aesay hi khaali peeli tension de reli hai, teri finger mien dard hai.
Kyun k apun kay rubber k gloves teray andar hi reh gaye hain.
Patient: Agar yeh baat hai to mujhay jaanay do.
Mien tumharay gloves ki payment kar doon ga.
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Munna: Bolay to darad kahan hai aapko.
Patient (F): Pooray badan mien hai
Munna: Yeh kaisay ho sakta hai ray, kuch detail batao.
Patient: Tocuhes her right knee and says here, then touches her earlobe and says here, then touches her left cheek and says here, etc.
Munna: Aesay hi khaali peeli tension de reli hai, teri finger mien dard hai.
Munna: Meray paas aik buri khabar hai, aur aik buhat hi buri khabar hai teray wastay.
Patient: Acha to pehlay buri khabar suna daal.
Munna: Apun k paas jo teri report pahunchi us mien likha tha k teray paas sirf 24 ghantay hain zinda rehnay k liye.
Patient: Sirf 24 ghantay. is say buri khabar kya ho sakti hai.
Munna: (Jadu ki Japhhi Dalte Hoauy) Mien kal say teray tak pahunchnay ki koshish kar raha hoon.
Patient: Acha to pehlay buri khabar suna daal.
Munna: Apun k paas jo teri report pahunchi us mien likha tha k teray paas sirf 24 ghantay hain zinda rehnay k liye.
Patient: Sirf 24 ghantay. is say buri khabar kya ho sakti hai.
Munna: (Jadu ki Japhhi Dalte Hoauy) Mien kal say teray tak pahunchnay ki koshish kar raha hoon.
Munna Bhai nay pehlay din office khola to bara khush tha. Us ki secertary nay bataya k bahar aik aadmi aaya hai.
Munna bahut khush hua aur usay andar aanay k liye kaha. Us k andar aanay say pehlay Munna nay socha k us par impression dalna chahiye aur phone utha k batien karnay laga.
Haan Haan! 500 rupay fees hai, apun 10 baje tak betha hai idher, is say late nahi karnay ka, apun bahut busy hai .
Us k baad us nay phone rakha aur aanay walay say poocha Beth na Maamoon, apun teray liye kya kar sakta hai?
Man: Mien phone sahi karnay aaya hoon.
Munna bahut khush hua aur usay andar aanay k liye kaha. Us k andar aanay say pehlay Munna nay socha k us par impression dalna chahiye aur phone utha k batien karnay laga.
Haan Haan! 500 rupay fees hai, apun 10 baje tak betha hai idher, is say late nahi karnay ka, apun bahut busy hai .
Us k baad us nay phone rakha aur aanay walay say poocha Beth na Maamoon, apun teray liye kya kar sakta hai?
Man: Mien phone sahi karnay aaya hoon.
Two women go out one weekend without their husbands. As they came back,just before dawn, both of them drunk, they felt the urge to pee. They noticed that the only place to stop was a cemetery. Scared and drunk, they stopped and decided to go there anyway. The first one did not have anything to blot herself with, so she took her panties off, used them and discarded them. The second, not finding anything either, thought "I'm not getting rid of my panties…" so she used the ribbon of a nearby flower wreath.
The morning after, the two husbands were talking to each other on the phone, and one says to the other: "We have to be on the look-out; it seems that these two were up to no good last night, my wife came home without her panties…"
The other one responded: "You're lucky, mine came home with a card stuck to her butt that read, "We will never forget you."
The morning after, the two husbands were talking to each other on the phone, and one says to the other: "We have to be on the look-out; it seems that these two were up to no good last night, my wife came home without her panties…"
The other one responded: "You're lucky, mine came home with a card stuck to her butt that read, "We will never forget you."
woman guest approaches the bar in a small restaurant.
She calls the guy at the bar and when he is standing in front of her, she asks him in a very seductive way to come nearer. Then she bends over the desk and starts to caress his beard. 'Are you the owner of this place?' she asks and touches tenderly his cheek.
'Ehhh. No. Not at all!' he replies.
'Would you please call him here?' the lady asks and gently touches his hair.
'Oh, I'm very sorry. But no. Impossible!' the man sighs.
'Would you then please do me a great favour?' the lady asks and follows gently the line of his lips.
'Of course. What ever you wish!' the man moans.
'I want to leave a message for the boss!' she says and let first one - then two - fingers slip into his mouth which he gently sucks on.
'What message?' he asks with the two fingers in his mouth.
'Please tell him that there is no paper, nor soap, nor towel in the lady's room!'
She calls the guy at the bar and when he is standing in front of her, she asks him in a very seductive way to come nearer. Then she bends over the desk and starts to caress his beard. 'Are you the owner of this place?' she asks and touches tenderly his cheek.
'Ehhh. No. Not at all!' he replies.
'Would you please call him here?' the lady asks and gently touches his hair.
'Oh, I'm very sorry. But no. Impossible!' the man sighs.
'Would you then please do me a great favour?' the lady asks and follows gently the line of his lips.
'Of course. What ever you wish!' the man moans.
'I want to leave a message for the boss!' she says and let first one - then two - fingers slip into his mouth which he gently sucks on.
'What message?' he asks with the two fingers in his mouth.
'Please tell him that there is no paper, nor soap, nor towel in the lady's room!'
sardar:- mistriji Bed majbut banana mere munde nu bahu pe chadna hai.
mistri:- aisa majbut bed banaunga ki sara mohalla bahu pe chad jaye to bhi kuch nahi tutega.
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A 16 yrs girl to old man---- uncleji lun.. seedha fudi mein dalo na niche bund mein slip ho raha hai
old man jan de kuriye jan de bhen chod nu gu khan di aadat hai.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
mistri:- aisa majbut bed banaunga ki sara mohalla bahu pe chad jaye to bhi kuch nahi tutega.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
A 16 yrs girl to old man---- uncleji lun.. seedha fudi mein dalo na niche bund mein slip ho raha hai
old man jan de kuriye jan de bhen chod nu gu khan di aadat hai.
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
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