Advice


"What sort of coach The eager young batsman had just scored yet another duck and was apologising to the captain. 'I think I could do with some advice. What sort of coach would you recommend?' 'A long distance one.'"

Indian Cricket Team

"Indian Cricket Team.... Batsman-bowler sat on the ball. Batsman-bowler had a great fall, All the bookies' cookies, All the bribers' men, Couldn't put Indian cricket together again. "

Lost Ball


"The boys were playing cricket in the garden and were using a shiny new ball. 'Where did you get the ball?' asked father. 'We found it.' 'Are you sure it was lost?' 'Of course it was lost. We saw them looking for it.' "

Cricket Job

"The cricketer was visiting the psychiatrist. Cricketer: 'It's terrible. I can't score runs, I'm a terrible bowler, and I can't hold a catch. What can l do? Doctor: 'Get another job.' Cricketer: 'I can't. I'm playing for India tomorrow !"

Wake Up!!

"The game was drifting off into total boredom, when a man in the crowd suddenly burst into a round of applause. The man next to him said 'Why did you do that?' 'Sorry' he replied 'I was trying to keep myself awake!'"

All Out..

The toothless victim was emerging from the anaesthetic. As he came to his senses, he saw the dentist packing up to go to lord's for the afternoon. 'Not a bad morning's work, eh?' said the dentist, cheekily. 'All out before lunch!'

Test Match week


Boss (to liftman): 'Mr Batt is feeling ill. Would you be so kind as to escort him home?'
Liftman: 'Certainly, sir. Anything else?'
Boss: 'Yes. As this is Test Match week, deliver him and get a receipt!'

Son:'Can I play cricket with the boys in the street?'
Dad:'No. They swear too much.'
Son:'But you play with them.'
Dad:'I swear already.'

Advice To captain

"The wicket-keeper had a high opinion of himself and was very free with his advice to the captain. 'You know,' he said, 'You've picked two men who should never be in the side.' 'Oh really,' said the captain icily, 'and who's the other one?' "

Harbhajan had first night. he asked his wife'is it first time for you?' she replied 'spinnerki evedina opening istara?...

Cricket explained

You have two sides one out in the field and one in.
Each man that's in the side that's in goes out and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out.
When they are all out the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in out.
Sometimes you get men still in and not out.
When both sides have been in and out including the not outs, THAT'S THE END OF THE GAME !
HOWZAT !!!!!

The cricketer and the psychiatrist

The cricketer was visiting the psychiatrist.
Cricketer: 'It's terrible. I can't score runs, I'm a terrible bowler, and I can't hold a catch. What can l do?
Doctor: 'Get another job.'
Cricketer: 'I can't. I'm playing for England tomorrow!'

Devils versus Angels cricket match

The Devils challenged the Angels to a game of cricket.
"But we've got all the cricketers," said the Angels.
"Yes. But we've got all the umpires!" exclaimed The Devils.

Friend: Why did you hit your husband with a chair?"
Wife: "I couldn't lift the table."
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What did one ghost say to another?
"Do you believe in people?"
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"Room Service,Can you send up a towel?"
" Please wait someone else is using it."
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When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance.
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I went alone on our honeymoon. My wife had already seen Niagara Falls .
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But the psychiatrist really helped me a lot. I would never answer the phone, because I was afraid. Now I answer it whether it rings or not.
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It was love at first sight. Then I took a second look !!
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"Look, guide, here are some lion tracks."
"Good. You see where they go and I'll find out where they came from."